respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
