he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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