Will you blow on my dice?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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