did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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