If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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