I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Everclear isn't food dammit
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
