Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
