Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
