8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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