When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
