Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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