I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
His hands were made for my vagina.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
