Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
