im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
