Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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