his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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