Dual....:-)
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
