I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Randomize
