Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
