If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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