Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
