I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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