Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
