Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
