I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
