shes about as inviting as chlamydia
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
