I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
