We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
