Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
These tits shall not be calmed
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
