He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
