Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm like, not good at living.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
