She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Randomize
