just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
