Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
