it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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