i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
