please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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