Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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