Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
