id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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