Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
He kissed a someone with a penis
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize
