You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I miss vodka workout Fridays
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize