sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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