Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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