Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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