Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
He felt like a one man threesome
I just googled if crying burns calories
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
