you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
