Im at strip club and am horny
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
