they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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