I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
