i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
